THE ASSERTIVENESS POCKET BOOK phần 8

"Tôi" báo cáo là một trong những mạnh mẽ nhất bạn có thể thực hiện, cả hai cho bản thân và những người khác. Trong báo cáo 'tôi', bạn khẳng định bạn là ai và những gì bạn muốn. Sử dụng chúng là dấu hiệu của sự quyết đoán. Tôi báo cáo có thể được sử dụng trong nhiều cách khác nhau: | ASSERTIVENESS SKILLS I STATEMENTS I statements are among the most powerful you can make both for yourself and others. In I statements you are affirming who you are and what you want. Using them is the hallmark of assertiveness. I statements can be used in a variety of ways Situation Interpretation and understanding Feelings and emotions Wants and needs Future actions 72 ASSERTIVENESS SKILLS I STATEMENTS Situation I have been asked to work late three times this week I see that I have been passed over for promotion again I notice that you have not spoken to me for three days Situation statements are powerful because they are factual and as an observation on your part they are non-negotiable. They describe the world as you see it and the way it affects you directly. Interpretation and Understanding I get the impression you are not interested I have the feeling you don t want my ideas I think you are ignoring me These statements are powerful because you re describing your interpretation of a situation not just the situation itself. It tells the other person directly the effect their behaviour is having on you. ASSERTIVENESS SKILLS I STATEMENTS Feelings and Emotions I feel betrayed I feel taken advantage of I feel angry disappointed cross annoyed This is not about feelings but really a way to express your opinion more strongly. Again these statements are powerful because they are non-negotiable or irrefutable. No one can challenge you and say No you don t feel that way . Wants and Needs I want you to pay attention I want your full co-operation I want you to be on time The strength of these statements is that they let the other person know your exact position and what you expect. They don t have to guess. They can only say Yes No or negotiate. 74

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